Motherhood So Far

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Before having Sophia I really thought I knew what kind of mother I was going to be…Mary Poppins…the Leave it to Beaver kind of mom….basically Mother Earth. I am not Mary Poppins even though I feel like my purse is a never ending pit for motherly needs. And I am certainly not the Leave it to Beaver kind of mom…you will not catch me wearing high heels and pearls as I clean the house.

I am that mother that if you were to walk in my house…my hair is up in a messy bun, running after Sophia and Jimmy (the dog) honking at my feet..wondering why the extra 15 pounds hasn’t melted off my body…and yes I wear my leggings as pants kind of mom.

And when I walk out of the house with my hair done, lipstick on and no stains to be seen…well at least..

It deserves a photo (and a cupcake, maybe some balloons even)..because the person that I was before becoming a mom is still here…somewhere…but she is a little lost right now.

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Motherhood has been the greatest adventure that I have ever been on, it has tested my limits many of times…and my patience. It has left me sitting on the kitchen floor crying when Sophia is asleep, because the level of stress for that day has gotten to me. It’s exhausting, but there is nothing like it in the world. It truly is rewarding.

I am a single mother, I have been a single mother for quite sometime and it’s purely exhausting. You are “on-call,” 24/7, you have to be available to their every need at all times. Being a single mom was not in the plan, I mean I don’t think it’s ever the plan. Sophia, Adrian and I were supposed to be a family…we were supposed to raise our daughter together, but when it doesn’t turn out the way you have planned you have no other choice but to make the best of the situation. Move forward and do what is best for your child.

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My single most important job is to make sure I am raising a decent human being. I want my daughter to grow up knowing that she is more than just a pretty face, you don’t need to look perfect on the outside to be smart, successful or even loved. I am raising my daughter to be strong, independent and to know her self-worth.

When I first became a mom almost three years ago, I honestly had no idea what I was getting myself into. I knew that I was going to love my child unconditionally and I knew that I was going to be the best mom that I could be. I knew that I was going to make a lot of mistakes along the way and I knew I wasn’t always make the right decision…but I was going to try my ultimate best. Sometimes that is something that we just need to do is our best.

So, all you mothers and fathers out there that are doing this “single parent thang,” give yourself a break…you got this. It won’t be easy….

But it will be totally worth it.

4 thoughts on “Motherhood So Far

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